Deer in the Headlights

This amusing paragraph was brought to my attention. It is about one of my live interviews on television when I was back home:

... [I] am sick of having to share God's time with the eternally annoying and distracting tv mobile on the stuffy bus 10 every morning. If i am not turned off by the silly questions that the hosts of 'primetime morning' like to ask (the cake goes to Suzanne Jung, who of all things to ask PJ Thum , the channel swimmer, as the opening question, asked, "so 35km, how many swimming pool lengths is that?" *slaps forehead* the next thirty seconds thus featured our heroic first-ever channel swimmer reduced to doing math in his head on live television, in order to answer that pointless question...) ... [By Matt, thepotatoeater.blogspot.com]

I was so jetlagged and exhausted that morning that when they asked me that question I nearly panicked. If they had asked me to add 1 and 1, I would've spent just as long trying to figure it out. Thankfully, I came up with the right answer, but still, it was a scary moment. I guess they wanted to try to help people relate to what I did, but still... it was nerve-wracking. I didn't expect it.

I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore

Regretfully, I must withdraw any endorsement (real or implied) I used to have of GQ magazine. The standards that it set when it first came out were excellent, but those standards have steadily slid for years, and after an abysmal summer I have to declare that I am over, done and finished with this magazine.

Apart from the still-steady Glenn O'Brien, the rest of the magazine no longer aspires to helping men find their feet sartorially and developing your own personal style. The magazine now deems itself to be an arbiter of fashion, that most ridiculous and transient of fallacies, and has descended to a mere shill for the makers of ready-to-wear clothing.

Take, for example, their list of "Rules" from earlier this summer, which included such priceless items such as:

"Buy a two button suit. It will give you a slimmer, more streamlined look, and it will better show off your shirt and tie. The days of three-button dominance are over." (I suppose your body type, height, size and weight are meaningless when it comes to how a jacket will look on your body.)

"Put toe taps on leather-soled dress shoes. They will significantly increase the shoes' life span." (Not to mention make you sound ridiculous wherever you walk. When I suggest we dress like Fred Astaire, that's not what I meant!)

"A dark, slim tie will instantly give any ensemble a younger, cooler feel. And unlike wider ties, it looks as good with a denim jacket as with a suit jacket." (Again, no regard for how you actually look. No, just follow our one-size-fits-all rules.)

"When you wear your trim two button suit, leave the belt in the closet - you don't need one. Going beltless lends the suit a clean, confident look." (And causes your trousers to fall around your ankles, too, for that clean, confident look of embarrassment. Men's waistlines change throughout the year and their lifetimes. Their trouser waists don't.)

Or their recent August edition's Editor's Picks which declared such items as motorcycle boots to be indispensible (?!). To be worn with your pinstripe trousers and shearling coat, no doubt.

In that same article, they declared the velvet blazer to be an Editor's Pick... only to declare, two months later, that the same item was now worn only by poseurs. I hope no one rushed out in August to buy a velvet blazer, only to find out that because so many people rushed out to buy it, it was now out of fashion!

In lieu of GQ, may I recommend Thomas Mahon's website, EnglishCut.com. He's a Savile Row tailor who has his own blog and his writing is extremely illuminating. More than anything else, he emphasises one of the most important rules of dressing: That style is individual, and what works for others will not work for you. Find your own style, develop it, and find a tailor who understands you. Much like life: Don't follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path, and leave a trail.

Sod's Law

I was waiting for an important phone callyesterday morning, but it refused to arrive. Finally I said to myself, it will only come if I go do something else. So I went to take a shower (bringing my phone into the bathroom with me), and true to form, no sooner had I soaped myself up than the phone rang.

Some hours later the same day, I was waiting for my futon to be delivered. I waited and waited, but again my phone refused to ring. Finally I went downstairs to make myself some toast and a cup of tea, and no sooner had I popped the bread into the toaster than I heard my phone ring upstairs.

Sod's Law at work is amazing. It's almost an immutable law of nature.

In a related way, I was in a stationery shop recently, and a pretty Chinese girl glanced up at me, did a double take, and smiled at me. I smiled back uncertainly. Nothing came of it, if you're wondering- but let me explain why I shyed away from the encounter.

After suffering the recent effects of being a quasi-pseudo-celebrity in Singapore, I'm no longer sure why people look at me. After all the whispering, pointing, and general "Look over there, it's P.J. Thum!" I endured in Singapore, I'm not surewhy anyone is looking at me anymore. This being England, I should have no reason to suspect anyone, but then again if someone looks Singaporean enough I will get nervous. Perhaps I am being a little egotistical, but then again I think I would characterise this more as paranoia... of which, as longtime readers know, I have plenty of.

Still, I suppose it's better than having girls ignore me, which is what I'm used to in the past. However, I suppose this relates to Sod's Law in that now that I have women checking me out in the street, I can't enjoy it.

Swell, Terrific, Dignified and Adorable People

I met up with a friend in London yesterday, went to check his blog today and what do I find? A blog entry about meeting up with me. So I guess this entry is also to return the favour, although what I had intended to do was to write about how fatherhood has changed him, how exhausted he looks, and how utterly adorable his daughter is. She has the widest, most brilliant eyes I've ever seen- and I've spent a lot of time looking at people's eyes. It's always been my belief that the eyes are windows into the soul, and so I tend to watch people's eyes. She looked up at me with the sweetest, most innocent look ever, and I just melted!

I was actually in London yesterday to have lunch with the Singapore High Commissioner. I thought I had escaped the demands on my time when I left Singapore, but the very first voicemail I received was from the High Commission, asking me to come to London! The High Commissioner turned out to be a nice chap, and I enjoyed talking to him. Speaking of nice people, I was presented with a gift from President Nathan- a book related to my studies! Imagine that, the President remembered our conversation and took the trouble to give me something relevant. What an absolutely terrific person he is! Truly, our President is a gentleman.

After that I met up with Peter Moore in London. Peter is a top-notch travel writer and it's always been an honour to talk to him. I forget how I first read his work- but I've eagerly awaited each new book he puts out. It was an honour to invite him up to Hertford College to speak over a year ago, and he and his wife are really nice terrific people. When I last saw him, fatherhood was impending and he looked a little worried about being a father and how his life would change. Now, over a year later, it was a chance to compare the before-and-after.

I was struck by how tired he was- no surprise- but also I think he seemed to be wiser. It may seem obvious- that parenthood makes you more thoughtful about the world, about your child and about your legacy- but there was also more gravity and dignity than before. Perhaps the weight of experience lent him greater force and conviction to his words and more depth to his thought.

As I've been saying, and keep saying, and said to Peter yesterday- swimming the Channel is next to nothing compared to marriage, and nothing compared to parenthood. He is a far, far greater man than I, as all parents are, for being willing to take that step.